Was that supposed to be a compliment?

Good morning!! I'm sure if you're on online dating like I am, you get a sundry of "compliments" on a regular basis. I just wanted to share a quick post about a few that I've gotten lately that I thought were really funny, and/or annoying!

• Guy: You look like the Queen

          Me: No...she's 90. I don't look like her at all. (I'm in my mid 30's for the record)
         
          Guy: Well, you are prettier

• Guy: You're really beautiful (his profile says he wants a relationship btw)

          Me: Awww thank you so much! How are you today?

          Guy: Wanna F**k?

          Me:

• Guy:  Your eyes shine brighter than the Sun on Neptune. I could look into them and get lost for years.

         Me (to myself): I'm clearly not answering this crazy. I'll probably end up tied up in his shed. 

• Guy: hi your really pretty and my name is greg* and i think we have alot in common and do you like to fish drink beer eat tacos?

         Me (also to myself): Not answering this because you clearly don't believe in punctuation "greg".  For the record, I do like to fish, drink beer and eat tacos lol

There are so many more that I could type but I'm out of time.  I'll do a Part II at a later date! Dating is super fun!!

Hookup Culture?

Hey everyone, I took a break from dating on the swiping apps for a bit and thought I'd try out one with more "substance". Believe it or not, it wasn't much better than the apps. I will say that the quality of guys I was matched with was better, however, they match you with tons of people who aren't paying subscribers and therefore, cannot reply to your messages you send them. After my 3 month subscription ended I thought I'd give the others another shot only to be sorely disappointed yet again. Look, I'm all about sex. I love sex. I think lots of sex is great, HOWEVER, I do not think lots of sex with random strangers you've been talking to on an app for a whole 5 minutes is good. Why is ok for a guy to send me a message and ask if he can, and I quote, "come over and give me his fat cock tonight" ok? All I did was swipe right, say hello, and that's the immediate response I get. All you stupid girls who say "oh yes, that sounds fantastic" to these douchey guys are the reason nice girls like me can't find a decent one. They all think that everyone is dtf 24/7, with any random Joe that says he wants to. Stop it. Seriously, you're not only doing a disservice to yourself but you're ruining it for the rest of us. And guys, you're not getting off the hook. Just because one bimbo said yes that one fateful night does not give you the right to hit every chick up on that app for a pic of their tits and blowie. Get over yourself, it's probably not as "fat" as you think it is anyways. We have to stop this hookup culture now or we are all going to be STD riddled, single senior citizens chilling in a nursing home later on in life. Go on real dates where you get to know someone...then go on another date and another date and ANOTHER FREAKING DATE with that person until you've developed a connection. Then, if you decide you want to have sex...have sex. Have lots of sex, but just have sex with that one person and be an ADULT in a COMMITTED relationship. Rant over. Have a great weekend and I'll post some actual date stories later!

Deal Breakers?

So, I recently joined a dating site that you actually have to pay for rather than just swiping left and right on people who are mainly just looking for sex while they're "in town" for business. Anyways, I joined this site thinking that my chances of finding someone who legitimately had the same interests relationship wise were higher and so far I've been pleased with my matches, but I have an issue with how some of these guys choose their deal breakers. It's a process once you match with someone. First you send them 5 multiple choice questions, then you send "make or breaks", then three questions they actually type an answer to and the final step is emailing one another. I've gotten to the make or break portion a few times and it really irks me that these guys who are overweight, select "excessive overweight" as one of their breaks. Ummm hello? You're fat too. So these guys can be overweight and mostly unattractive but they want a Barbie doll? I realize that excessive overweight is different than just kinda overweight but I still think that if you're overweight at all, that should not be one of your deal breakers. That's all for now :)

Put a Baby in Me?

Listen y'all, I'm all about procreation and one of these days I would love nothing more than to have a mini Ginger running around but, messaging me on the dating app and telling me that you would like to have a baby with me is a little creepy. I mean come on, at least buy me dinner and LOTS of drinks first before you sweep in with that comment. Yes, I am of the age where having children is appealing but it is not appealing to have you repeatedly message me and tell me that we would make pretty babies together. Umm hello? Obviously they'd be pretty...they'd be part me! Haha jk ;) but seriously, ease up dudes. No ladies, except ones just after your money, wanna hear this lame ass pick up line. Move along.

Fan Bashing?

I live in a state where we have two baseball teams. It's pretty cool honestly because I love baseball and that's just more games for me to go to and cheer for my state. I'm a bigger fan of one of the teams than the other BUT if my state is playing you, I'm cheering for them ESPECIALLY if your team is the NY Yankees. So this Summer, my Dad scored free club level tickets to the team that is less popular, but they were playing the Yanks so I jumped on the bandwagon and bought a shirt. We took pictures before the game and one of them was super cute so I used it on my profile. The other day I was messaging a guy who said he was a lot of fun and he like girls that were sassy. I'm pretty sassy, I know you don't know this yet, just trust me. Anyways he was only sending one word answers so I told him to get back at me when he was feeling more lively. He writes back and says something to the effect of "Oh, already getting sassy are we? Fucking *insert team name* fan." Ummm, seriously? Did he just try to insult me based on a team that he thinks I like? So I write him back of course and say something similar to that and he informs me that it's called fan bashing. I had already explained the situation, why I was wearing the shirt, where my allegiance lies for baseball etc and yet he continues with his "fan bashing". First of all, I don't love any team enough for someone to truly insult me by insulting them. Second of all, why in the world would he even think that was remotely ok to do? He also told me to take the picture down if I wasn't really a fan. Y'all, I was laughing out loud reading these messages. I told him he was and idiot, gave him enough time to see it and then unmatched his dumb ass. Dodged a bullet, or a foul ball, there! See ya soon!

What's the Deal?

If you're like me, you work a lot and it's in an environment where you aren't likely to meet anyone you'd like to date. Let's be honest though, you probably don't wanna date anyone you work with anyways because that's just asking for unnecessary drama in the office. You ask all your friends to set you up but they don't know any single guys, or any they feel confident in setting you up with. You try the grocery store route, but really, how many people met their spouse in the grocery store? You try church at the suggestion of your mother, and while I love me some Jesus, I don't really feel like going to church to meet a guy is why I should be at church. So, last resort, you join the lovely world of online dating and it is a HOT FREAKING MESS. Before I delve into any stories, let me just vent a little bit about the things I'm not a fan of when it comes to online dating.

•  Most of the guys (I know girls do it too) misrepresent themselves in one way or another. I've met up with guys who had 10 year old pictures, pictures they stole from a better looking friend, ones who have lied about their age which I thought was odd, ones that lied about their job/career and the one I hate the most, their height. Guys come on. I'm 5'7 and if you say that you're 5'9 only to show up and be the same height as me, something isn't right. I have not hit a growth spurt at 34 years old or forgotten that I was taller than I said I was. If most of the girls are like me, we really don't care about height but we do care about honesty. Own what the good Lord gave you and stop saying you're two inches taller than you say you are.
• Why can't I just say hey, hi or what's up when I first message you? I often see on guy's profiles that they won't message you back if you use something like that to start the conversation off. Really? When you hit on a girl in a bar do you have an entire creative paragraph thought up in your head of things to say to her about her likes/dislikes, interests, hobbies, job etc? Probably not because one, that would be weird if you already knew that much about her and two, who starts a conversation like that in real life? A simple hi is fine in person, a simple hi is fine online.   
• Did you seriously just message me to tell me that my current profession is coincidentally a fantasy you've had for a long time? Gross. This is almost a guaranteed un-match or block. Idgaf if you've always wanted to have sex with someone who does what I do, that is a not an appropriate way to start a message (see, this is where a simple hi comes in handy) and honestly, how many girls would say "Oh really? Well let me get naked for you and help you fulfill it!" None. Well, maybe some but you really probably shouldn't sleep with them if they're that eager to help you out. 
• No I will not come over to your house on a first date and "watch a movie". It's 2016, we all know what that is code for. Also, you don't know me and I don't know you. It's so not safe or smart to have someone over to your house that you've never met! I don't have violent tendencies but on the off chance that you run into a real life Lizzie Borden, I doubt you want her Netflix and chilling on your couch. 
• If you swipe right and we match, SAY HI! I don't mind saying hi first but seriously, if I message you, message me back. I'm not asking you to build a rocket, just answer me back. 
• To be continued....

Stay tuned for some fun stories and conversations! 

Introductions

Hi everyone, thanks for stopping by! I need to be honest with you from the get go, my name isn't really Ginger Gallagher. For the sake of my family, friends and full time job I felt like it was probably better to write under a pseudonym. This blog is all about the trials and tribulations of my online dating "adventures". I've obviously changed the names of the dudes in the stories, however, if you find that you relate to one of the characters you probably need to reevaluate your life and quit being a douche since 95% of the guys in my stories are in fact a douche. I'm not a grammatical wizard or literary genius so if I have a run-on sentence or throw a comma in the wrong place, just let it slide. This blog will by no means be formal, it will likely contain graphic/suggestive language and is definitely not meant for the eyes of children. There's no need to judge my poor decisions, just read, laugh, commiserate, enjoy or move on to a more boring blog. I hope that some of you can relate to what I'm going through and that you feel my pain as a single, 30 something, career driven woman just trying to get my date on.